Summer rain hits different. Warm drops glide smoothly. Trees absorb what the clouds share, providing strength to grow Grow tall and tower over the sky, making shade. Underneath the ensemble of trees, darkness all around Leaves fall and glide through the wind– The same way I fell for you. Breaking off my roots, intertwining with yours Perfect could not even describe the lust, That came after I fastened to you. However then my green shine turned brown Crumbly bits that can break if stepped upon The downfall after bliss pays a visit. Summer monsoons hit different now Rain gets angry and causes a storm to prevail. However, I can’t take the hail The loud thump thump thump terrifies me. Expecting you to tell me not to worry Then realizing I’m alone to endure this storm. Summer rain has the ability to make plants blossom; Summer rain left pain shooting through my spine.
i love how you jump around from so many emotions in this poem because it is such a real and authentic way to think about an unhealthy relationship. i like how you connected the first line to the second-to-last. i also love the double entendre of that line:
ReplyDeleteBreaking our hearts to pieces.
- this sensation could be caused from a mutual breakup, but you very creatively take the narrative away from yourself and put the focus on the nameless child that drops the snow globe as you break with it. neither you nor your loved one are responsible with initiating this breakup; you both are bombarded by the relationship coming apart, and neither of you have control over it. i think it's a fascinating way to look at unhealthy relationships in general because sometimes it's hard to put your foot down and initiate a breakup; this poem breaks you up instead. this is beautifully done. i also really love how every line ends with a period, serving as a stopping point in your relationship. it makes the meaning of your poem curt and cold and definitive.
I loved how you worded this perfectly...exactly what she said. this poem is so good I love it.
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